Misunderstood

Happy new year everyone! I know It's been such a long time since I've written and that mainly has to do with my fear of getting back into it. I don't want to write something until I have a complete understanding of it and it speaks to me. Generally right before I end up writing, the thoughts all hit me at once, but then comes the fear of making it a good post at that. But they are thoughts that must come out and must come to the light. And without further ado Misunderstandings.

So it all just kind of hit me today, while washing dishes. My first idea of being misunderstood all came back with my post about misconceptions. They both kind of go together. These misconceptions happen because of these misunderstandings and they will continue to happen until someone speaks out against them. These lies and hurtful comments will continue to be told unless we tell them the truth and we be confident and proud of it. What proof do I have of this? Miley Cyrus.

Miley Cyrus is a famous singer/actress. She was mainly known for her role as Miley Stewart/Hannah Montana on Disney channel, but now she is known as the girl who hit the tabloids and Hollywood with a wrecking ball and she won't stop. I kid and play fun with her songs, but this is where it started. A couple years after her show on Disney channel was cancelled she soon barged back into the public eye like a wrecking ball. This lead her to be misunderstood.

She confesses to her father and to the public that she is no longer Hannah Montana, but this new adult and R rated Miley Cyrus. I get it, she wants to have fun, she wants to be herself. She didn't want to be settle, she wanted to reach new limits and show that she was going to be somebody in the generation. And she did it. But what went wrong here? After she showed that it was her party and she could do what she wants, sipping from red cups and sweaty bodies everywhere, twerking all over Robin Thicke at the VMA's, the public saw this as Miley Cyrus going crazy.

They thought she was going to be another washed up Disney star who gave into drugs and was ruining her life... *cough* *cough* Lindsay Lohan... And this was the start of it. But then, after her single We Can't Stop was settling down, she came out with another song called Wrecking Ball, which I admit confused me at first, but now I think I'm starting to understand.

I was one of those people who judged Miley, solely on what she was recently doing and not what she was saying and when I seen Wrecking Ball, I thought she was truly insane! I thought she was just going nowhere. But then I listened to the song again and watched the music video... She touched me. In that moment, I understood everything that she had been doing. She wasn't insane, she was showing that she had changed and she was going to be somebody more than Hannah Montana. Wrecking Ball was her way of apologizing to everyone. She didn't mean to hit everyone with the news that, "Hey, I'm not a virgin anymore and I drink and party all night with mac miller and Frizzy! Ooh kill em ooh! #twerkteam!" She didn't mean to barrage us all with the new her, and she's sorry.

Why did I choose this to write about? Why did this touch me so much? Because sometimes when coming out and someone doesn't accept us at first, this is almost exactly what It's like. That moment when you sit your loved one down and you let them know who you really are and this is how you're going to live your life, you are basically throwing it at them all at once and it is not an easy thing to process. I always jump to think, well why should it matter, I'm still me! Yes, but you are me in a different view now, which is going to take some new understandings. So like I said, when a lie or misconception comes up, break the misconception.

So moral of the story is, be understanding of where people are coming from, no matter what it is they may be doing, because chances are, it wasn't easy for them to bring out. Now everybody put your hands in the air! Ok, no more Miley puns... Good night everyone, enjoy your snowdays!

~Be Breezy!~

Misconception vs. Reality

Ok, so a couple of weeks back, I came out at the barbershop. I used to go to school with one of the barbers there and he knew of my involvement in the school's GSA. I eventually gave way into his curiosity and came out to him. This was something I wasn't expecting...

I knew this kid as the immature party guy that everyone loved. He used to touch guys and rub us in chorus to make us feel uncomfortable, he was cool with everyone, and he was pretty attractive. I never thought this kid could be mature. He was a grade ahead of me, but acted like a freshman for as long as I knew him! But now, here was this same guy, grown up, married, graduated from high school, mature, and talking about his future. And he even had his very own mature thoughts in my sexuality and standing in my coming out process.

He explained that his sister's brother was gay and his grandfather was gay so he was used to it and he knew how it effected people. He was never really homophobic, I just thought he was one of those guys that acted gay, but when it came down to it, would punch the shit out of a guy who'd flirt with them!

Anyways, later throughout our conversation about homosexuality, my usual barber jumps into the conversation and then this conversation turned more into a debate. I was in no way offended by what they said because this was just a matter of sharing feelings and thoughts. I said what I thought and they thought what they thought. Did I agree with them? Not all the time, but that's part of debates. They also said some things that didn't quite make sense to them, but did to me, but they still would run around with it.

My usual barber had these misconceptions about being gay that most old-fashioned people would say, that were just blatantly wrong. I think I even heard my dad say some of these things... One of the things he said was that gay people try to hog attention. This I know my dad say. His example was with the new outing in the NBA by Jason Collins. "Who cares about him being gay?! It has nothing to do with the game! Don't think you're going to get special treatment because you're gay! And why do they make such a big deal about it in entertainment. It has nothing to do with anything!".

To this I knew the answer and he couldbt help but agree. These people in the public eye are viewed as role models. Kids look up to these people and it is important that these people set kids in the right direction, whether It's standing out against something, standing for something, or being true to yourself. Before Collins, there were no openly gay players in the NBA. This makes it seen like this sport isn't for gay people. This makes kids feel bad about themselves and feel like they can't follow their dreams because of their homosexuality. What Collins did by coming out was show that it is possible to be a basketball player and gay. Same goes for Anderson Cooper,  Ricky Martin, and frank ocean. What they did was show that you can be gay and a famous news reporter or entertainer. This made kids realize that they are not alone. That they have someone to relate to them and to look up to.

Another thing my barber had a problem with was "how gays push their homosexuality on everyone. It's only your business, you don't gotta tell the whole world you're gay. You don't see straight people running around saying 'I'm straight' or throwing parties and shit!" The answer to this misconception is we're not. We are not pushing anything on anyone. All we are doing is letting everyone know that we are here and we are going to be heard. We tell people so that they may know another gay person so they know whom it is that they may be talking about when they try to slander our names. So they can realize there is something other then straight families. You hear us all the time because we are fighting for acceptance. We are not trying to push anything on you. You know why straight people don't run around telling people their straight? Because it is accepted and expected. We have to go that extra mile to tell everyone that we don't like the opposite sex. And then on top of that, we have to deal with whoever just moved out of our lives! You know why we have pride parades, because most of us can't and aren't proud to be who we are and this is to say It's ok. Straight people font have to worry about that because they don't have to hide that aspect of themselves. We do.

The last thing that he said, which admittingly pissed me off a little, was "They are trying to teach little kids how to be gay. They are trying to teach my little 10 year old and 7 year old about cock and balls. Now I gotta worry about sending my children to a school where they talk about that? Fuck that, kidnergartners don't need to know about that shit!" My barber is referring to SB48 in California where it states that schools must provide education in homosexuality. For one thing, his facts were wrong, this policy is not for kindergartners. It is for kids that are mature enough to hear and handle this information. For me, sexual education happened right at the end of 5th grade to prepare us for this knowledge in 6th grade and so on. At this age we were about 9-11. At this point in time, some kids have already started going through puberty and most kids had already been dating and have had their first kisses done and over with a while back. This is where this knowledge comes in handy because this is the age where kids start experimenting and asking questions. They are not going to tell a kidnergartner who has no idea who the president is about any form of love. You don't tell your 1st grader about pussy and boobs right? Why would we tell them about cock and balls then? All SB48 is saying is to provide the homosexual information along with heterosexual. Which could basically be done by just acknowledging what it is and the dangers that can come from it.That is all they did with hetero sex, why would it be any different? To explain homosexuality, all you need to do is define it. Then tell them to throw on a condom and get tested. There is no explanation of what goes where and who does what. They don't tell us what goes where and how to do what with hetero sex. We are not teaching kids how to be gay or teaching any "homosexual behaviors". Just informing students that another form of love is out there known as homosex and that is just as risky as heterosex.

This is what I hate about debates, but also what I love about them. I hate it when people use this one thing that gay people have done, but don't loom into what it is and assume It's something bad. Then they pass it on as knowledge and then comes up as a misconception. I like when they come up against me with those misconceptions because then I have a chance to shut their dumbasses up! They have no idea what they're talking about or what we're doing, so don't try and create misconceptions out of something you don't understand.

Thanks for reading anyone, I hope everyone enjoyed! Have a great day guys!

~Be Breezy~